The Many Faces of Sherri

My Extra Skin

You may have noticed that my blog entries are slowly going down to one or two a month...
That's because I am super busy and with school starting up soon, I don't know how well I am going to balance it. Eventually, I will be right back into the daily grind so I can look good for my future husbands at the college.... LOL!!!
But anywayz...
The reason I am writing this blog is to reenact an encounter I had with a co-worker. It went a little like this...
Co-worker: You look good!! How much weight have you lost?
Me: About 77 pounds
Co-worker: Wow!! 77 pounds!! I don't want to be mean asking this but, where did all your extra skin go?

HUH??!!

WHAT??!!

Yeah, I walked away from that one.

• First of all, do not confuse me with one of the lost souls from the TLC show, "My 600 Pound Life".
• I did not get any surgical procedures that include snipping, clipping, removing, stapling, burning, tucking, or drainage tubes!!
• Do I look like the Pillsbury Dough Boy?! My stomach doesn't roll out like a freaking pizza crust...
• I literally worked my ass off everyday to get to where I am at. I didn't lay down and eat gravy and cream corn until I disappeared. Hard fucking work and dedication will always work!! You just have to convince yourself first. I am not God, so what makes me any different than you?
• If you have to add a forewarning to a question, you intentions were to piss me off. Don't go there with me because you work with me almost everyday. I will destroy you...

While I am down here on a whole new level, I would like to include that I am no longer excepting diet tips... I am open to all exercise tips for toning but as far as dieting advice goes...

Not to be mean, but I am ignoring it...

Back to the positive side now...

Yesterday was the first day I did a run/walk through the Courthouse. Yes people, I ran and it was amazing. (And no, I was not being chased by anything)

I guess it is time for a new Blogger Book because all the pages are dried together now :((

My Weight Loss is....

While I was at work staring at an entire display of Hormel chili, I decided to come up with this slightly entertaining and informative blog...
Please enjoy this because I left my mouse at home and this took FOREVER to do....

My current weight loss is....

76 POUNDS

Now with my amazing abilities to think WWWAAAAYYY outside of the box, I'm going to compare this with a few things...

My weight loss is equivalent to...

This Child

My weight loss is about the same as...

9.5 Gallons of Water

I have lost...

 7 Dell Diamond Black 17.3" Inspiron N7110 Laptop PC with Intel Core i3-2350M Processor and Windows 7 Home Premium with Windows 8 Pro Upgrade Option. Now available at walmart.com with prices starting at $528.97.

I have lost enough weight to equal...

81 Cans of Hormel Turkey Chili with No Beans

...and since I am a fan of my paint program now...

I have lost...

101 Cans of Soda/Beer

And for my Grand Finale'

My total weight loss is the same as...

152 Double Quarter Pounders

...and let me tell you...

I FEEL GREAT!!!!



Pet-Peeves from the Gym Part 1

(The library is unusually LOUD today)


I know I have talked about some things that irritate me at the gym.
Well, this is an update...

The Door

I could write a book about this door. This is no normal door, this is the door to the ladies locker room.

Let me explain why this annoys me in two scenarios.

Scenario 1

If I open the door, usually I am opening it for me. If I open this door and you try to slide by me, I will push you right back out of it. Here at the gym, it seems people wait for the door to open like they are fucking royalty. Believe me when I say, two people can NOT fit comfortably in this doorway.

Scenario 2

(This one is more popular)

There are two people outside the door having a conversation. The second the door opens, one of them tries to wrap up the conversation like the door will never open again. Like it's the last train leaving for Chicago. If you are caught in this, make sure you open the door with you shoulders so that there is no way you get left holding it. Just come out of that locker room like a barrel from Donkey Kong's Adventure and roll your way to the treadmill.

The Scale

The scale will always and forever be my pet peeve because it won't say the number I want it to. It moves way too slow, in the wrong direction, half the time.

Besides the mental issues I have with the scale, here is a common one.

Do you see the picture of the scale I stuck on this blog?

See anything wrong with it?

Do you see it?!

It's water...

Let me help you out by turning the picture sideways.

Someone has taken the time out to draw two eyes and a smile... :D

Thank you, Picasso!

I guess I am different from everyone else but the second I jump out of the pool or shower, the scale is my last stop. If I had to compare this method to something it would be me weighing myself before and after eating a meal. I rather not set myself up for failure...

I guess what I am trying to say is... I DON'T NEED YOUR BATHWATER ALL OVER THE SCALE TRYING TO MAKE ME THINK I GAIN TWO POUNDS!!

THANK YOU!

This has been a Sherri Clayborne public announcement...

Don't Eat and Drive

Don't Eat It!

Okay guys,

"It's been a long time coming, but I kknnnnooowwww, a change is gonna come.."
~Sam Cooke

BUT I'M BACK!!!

(I know y'all missed me dearly)

 

I'm guessing it was a combination of me losing my journal and my amazing Birth-Week celebration. But seriously when I found my journal it looked like someone used it to stop a leaky pipe. I really just don't want to know...

But anywho...
Back on my grind and back to the gym.

(My Current Starting Weight)

     The reason I'm writing this blog is not to welcome myself back but it is to inform people of an ongoing situation. Have you ever heard of diets that focus on eating only one or two food groups? Like the Cottage Cheese Diet, Cabbage Soup Diet, or the infamous Water Diet? I don't know about everyone else but the reason that I am overweight is because I like to eat a lot of RANDOM foods. So, in all reality, do you think I will be able to stop all of that (cold turkey) and eat cottage cheese for breakfast, lunch, and dinner?
     
     No seriously, I want y'all to sit down and think about this one. I have only been eating whatever the hell I wanted for about, (uh) twenty years, but I would trade it all in, (at the blink of an eye) for some cabbage... THAT I DON'T EVEN LIKE!!
I'd give it about four days. I'm sure Dodge's Chicken doesn't serve cabbage...

But, the point that I'm trying to make is that....
You can't rush into a diet, especially a diet that will get you DEAD. Is cottage cheese covering all the food groups that you are required to have in a day? Try that and then go to the gym for two hours and see if your butt won't be in the hospital!
That's called food shock...
Better yet it's a form of anaphylactic shock from lack of food. Your allergic to NOT eating!!
STOP IT!!

If you decide to carry out the goals to a healthier lifestyle by dieting here are some helpful hints:

1. Diet covers all the food groups
2. All diets should include at least thirty minutes of physical activity a day
3. Diet is affordable and/or a diet your willing to stay dedicated to
4. ~IMPORTANT~ YOUR NOT STARVING YOURSELF  (Nobody is the same, if your hungry, EAT!!)

Food is an addiction...

If you choose to change your eating patterns, remember that you are trying to change something that has been permanent for a while. You may fall off track a couple of times but as long as you don't give up. Remember, you are fighting an addiction.

Peace, Love, and Happiness

~Sherri

Weekly Weigh-In's

This is something that I have while dieting.
I'm going to list it in step formation.

1. Get a 2012 Calendar
2. Pick one day of the week out of the month to record your current weight
3. Track your progress!!

I weigh myself every Monday because the moon and the earth are aligned and I weigh less on this day. This is an amazing form of motivation. I have tracked my weight all the way back to January 1st. It really isn't a good thing to weigh yourself everyday. (LOL, even though I do twice a day. Don't follow in my footsteps!! You will beat yourself up!!) Once a week, write down your weight, even if it went up from last week. If you do this, you can reflect on what might have been done wrong that week and what changes can be made for improvements.




Like I said, "Don't Knock It Before You Tried It!!"
~Sherri